Comfort Over Chaos: Inside the New Self-Care Choices Women and Men Are Making

By Stacy M. Brown

Senior Global Correspondent

Friday nights are being redefined, and so is self-care.

Across living rooms and kitchen tables, women are choosing softness over spectacle, trading packed calendars and crowded rooms for sweatpants, shared plates, and unfiltered conversation with friends who know them well. At the same time, men are spending more time in the mirror than they once admitted, paying closer attention to how they look, how they age, and how they feel in their own skin.

“I think women are craving spaces where they can fully exhale,” said Liz Suchy, vice president of marketing at Cabot Creamery. “A night in with girlfriends offers comfort, connection, and permission to be exactly who you are.”

New national surveys conducted by Talker Research suggest these are not just passing trends but deliberate choices. For women, staying in together has become a priority tied to mental health, bonding, and rest. For men, grooming routines have grown more detailed and intentional, driven by confidence, aging, and self-perception rather than outside pressure.

A Talker Research survey of 2,000 women ages 21 and older, conducted on behalf of Cabot Creamery ahead of Galentine’s Day, found that 46 percent now prefer girls’ nights in, compared with 33 percent who favor nights out. The preference reflects more than convenience. It points to a desire for emotional ease and environments where women feel most at home.

That comfort matters. Eighty six percent of women surveyed said the cozy factor is important on a girls’ night in, with four in ten calling it very important. One third described these gatherings as essential to their mental health and wellbeing, while others said time with close friends is when they feel most like themselves.

Those connections are being made intentionally. Forty three percent of women said they make time for girls’ nights at least once a month, and one in ten gathers weekly. The dress code mirrors the mood. Casual outfits were the most popular choice, and 35 percent said pajamas feel ideal and appropriate for quality time at home.

Conversation anchors the night. When asked what makes a girls’ night successful, women ranked quality conversation first, followed by good food and drinks. Cheese and crackers emerged as the most popular pairing, chosen by 55 percent of respondents. Cheese paired with meats, fruit, and wine followed closely behind.

Food themes add personality to the evening. Taco night and girl dinner night ranked as the most popular options, while charcuterie and wine placed among the top food and drink combinations. Beverage preferences leaned toward flexibility. Soda ranked highest, followed by wine and margaritas. Coffee, tea, and hot chocolate also appeared frequently, and most women said it is important to have nonalcoholic options available so everyone feels included.

Galentine’s Day has become a meaningful extension of this shift. Forty one percent of women said celebrating friendship on February 13 feels just as important as Valentine’s Day. Planned activities ranged from movie nights and games to cheese tastings, and nearly a quarter said they have traditions they return to each year.

Some women described exchanging gifts and reflecting on their relationships. Others spoke about taking time to tell each friend something meaningful about herself that she may not realize. Across responses, the emphasis was on presence and care rather than production.

While women are leaning into togetherness, men are quietly reshaping how they think about personal care.

In a separate Talker Research survey commissioned by Just For Men, 2,000 men ages 25 and older said they care more about their appearance today than they did five years ago. Nearly 70 percent reported turning to some form of outside help to slow age-related changes, from skin care products to specialty hair treatments.

The study found that men now average seven steps in their daily grooming routines, paying close attention to body care, facial hair, and head hair. More than half said they spend more time on grooming than they did three to five years ago, and 51 percent said they spend more money.

Confidence emerged as a key motivator. Men said they want to feel better about themselves, be more appealing to partners, and make stronger impressions at work. Concerns about aging also played a role, with nearly three in five citing gray hair and wrinkles as top worries.

Even so, many men keep those concerns private. More than a third said they rarely talk about aging or grooming with friends or family, and 16 percent said they never discuss it at all, pointing to lingering discomfort around the topic.

Together, the two surveys illustrate a major cultural recalibration. Women are carving out space for rest, honesty, and connection. Men are investing time and attention in routines that help them feel confident and grounded. Both shifts center on intention and self-awareness rather than performance.

“Valentine’s Day always reminds me to celebrate the people who make life brighter,” Suchy said. “My girlfriends are my biggest cheerleaders and the ones I can always count on, so treating them to a cozy night in feels every bit as special as going out.”